Tag Archives: life

WILW – June 14th, 2017 – Tell Momma that I love her.

Some days being a working mom leaves me missing my kids terribly in the run of a day. Today is one of those days. What I love is knowing that Daddy is at home, in charge, and just a few characters away if I want to briefly check in. A quick text from him with a message from a little 4 year old saying “tell momma, ‘I love momma – love me’ so she will know that I love her” makes my heart swell. Extra cuddles at bedtime!

-RFM

“I Have Bad News”

Not the kind of thing you want to hear at 6 am. We knew this was coming, how could we not? Ever since we signed Little Man up for preschool two days a week we knew there were hidden strings attached; every sickness that went through the place, every germ passed from every runny, snot-nosed kid, every uncovered cough-our kid was susceptible to catch, and therefore, pass on as well.

It had started in the morning with the “Yop incident.” How many times have I told my husband, “No milk/dairy on an empty stomach”? LM is particularly sensitive to sudden x amount of dairy and paired with his impeccable gag reflex and dislike of textures, it’s not always a pretty scene (especially at fancy dining rooms whilst on vacation after drinking several coffee creamer cups). Then, later that day it was a cry for help as LM sat on the toilet complaining “I just can’t stop pooping!” Poor thing. We’ve all been there but there’s a reason there’s a saying “ignorance is bliss.” So, this particular night Little Man had been asleep for a while when he woke up to use the washroom. Not unusual. He seemed a bit irritable as I tucked him back into bed and a little pale maybe. But he was coughing-getting over this family-spread head cold that I swear was brought on by the flu shot and the poorly sanitized handles at the shopping carts at the supermarket. Moments later he was up out of bed and headed for the washroom again. Ok, unusual. He sat there whining about poop and then all of a sudden there was vomit on the floor. Ok fair is fair, the husband was on cleanup duty for the Yop incident so now it was my turn. I flipped the little 4 year old over so that his other end was near the bowl. He climbed up almost fetal position on the toilet seat retching whatever he had. I was just getting the acquired cleaning supplies and the husband was rubbing Little Man’s back in comfort when a fountain of surprise came out the other end making its way to the floor. Yep…my turn to clean. Into the bath he goes.

Alas, everything is cleaned up and I get these big boy overnight padded disposable underwear kept just for said occasions and try to convince Little Man to wear them. No such luck. My ultimatum is that if he wanted to sleep in our bed the pull up had to be worn or he could chose regular underwear and sleep in his own bed. He went for the latter. There was no way I was risking an accident in my fairly new, barely even paid for, queen size mattress not to mention the carpeted flooring over his bedroom hardwood. Imagine my gratefulness over my strong-headed decision when at 6 am I hear a small knock on the door. I was just dreaming of tiny angels descending and bringing me a candy cane striped Christmas card when my eyes pop open with the sound and I see a tiny figure come stumbling into the room beside me. He looks at me, “I have bad news.” “What’s the bad news?” I ask, almost fearfully. “I pooped. And there was a lot of it.” Uh-oh. “Where?” “In my bed and on the floor” he said. I stayed in bed registering what he had just said. Husband got up to deal with it. His turn. I put on my housecoat and prepared myself as I walked out into the hall.

I’ll spare the details but it really wasn’t that bad. Little Man was clam and had already cleaned himself up and put on a new pair of underwear. Nothing a bit of washing and Mr. Clean disinfectant couldn’t solve (Mr. Clean for the floor, not the kid obviously). I stripped the bed, cleaned up the floor, scrubbed a small unfortunate area of the mattress and got Little Man ready to go back to bed-again. This time he opted for the padded underwear and went on the couch with daddy and a book. I went back to bed and rather quickly as I heard another small voice calling out from his crib from the other room. My telepathic message to my husband echoed “YOUR TURN!”

Momma Paparazzi: When Photos Replace Memories

I have hundreds, even thousands of pictures of my kids. Everything from special events to the ordinary and mundane. Every cute quirk or silly hairstyle is captured in a pixalated time capsule stored in binary code on a hard drive. However, it seems of late that I am more inclined to flip through my Facebook albums to recall certain dates and moments rather than my checking my internal memory bank. When I remember the special moment, I rely on the image imprinted into my mind as I stood behind the camera. Little Man’s smile on his second birthday is a still photo etched into memory that I can pull out in digital form anytime I want and not a real-life motion replay.

The thing is, we as parents are so engrossed in “capturing” the moment that we forget how important it is just to be in the moment. Over the summer, my family and I enjoyed a wonderful day at a relative’s cabin by the lake. Of course, I’m the one with the cell phone/camera and tend to be the one behind the pictures and not in them. As my husband took the kiddies out in the water for a little dip, I was more concerned about getting the shot, the “aww” moments with daddy, that I didn’t manage to really get in for a swim myself. My mind was on keeping the memory in a semi-permanant still image whilst keeping the phone out of reach of wet hands, or worse, the lake itself.

Have you ever heard someone look at a beautiful scene in nature and breathlessly announce that it is “just like a painting“? Has anyone considered how backward this is? Art and paintings are meant to capture the beauty of what is seen. It’s a representation of jealousy; what paint only desires to be and what an artist interprets in his own eye. Nature should not be limited to acrylic and oil. It is so much more than that. Colours and hues that change with the light, whispers in the wind and scents so fragrant and sweet. It needs to be experienced, felt, smelled, tasted, and seen. Visual imagery is just one part of memory storage. Memory also relies on the other 4 senses, such as olfactory, and at times it does not require any conscious attention at all.

Likewise are our memories. They need to be experienced and felt. Photographs are filling up our disk space and news feeds and we feel accomplished that memories have been stored. But how do our children see us when we are constantly asking for a “CHEESE” and demanding for them to “Stay still”? What do our children see when all we do is act like the momma paparazzi? Our faces partially hidden by a block of technology meant to enhance our lives (which begs the question, what is being enhanced?) I’m at the lake and as I watch my husband with my boys having that “aww” moment, I’m thinking about how to keep this alive and frozen at the same time. And I think, “It’s simple…”

Just put down the camera, enjoy the moment for what it is. Photographs have too long been taking the place of our memories and our experiences. Our brains are getting lazy, untrained synapses making recall all too hazy because of the “easiness” of flicking through an online album instead of the mental files. Memory retention requires Memory Rehearsal which helps train our brain. When our children grow up and we pass on, what is our legacy? Will they need to rely on outdated disks and hard drives to remember us and their childhood? Or will they remember the experience and the time we spent together?

 

Enjoy the experiences of today,

Kathryn

WILW-May, 7th

I love spending time with my boys one-on-one. Sometimes it’s like there’s a switch in their personalities and they revel in the focused, undivided attention from their momma.
This afternoon it’s just me and Bambino. Without Little Man taking charge of the toys and territory he is free to do as he pleases; and he is loving it! I love seeing this side of him and it’s fun to speculate how his personality will grow and change as he continues to grow.
Here’s Bambino, the little poser, saying “Cheese!!” He just loves the camera.

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